Voldie: Hey guys i just ran into my old tennis partner! Darth Vader. He's a dark lord as well.
Darth Vader: Hey whats happening *breaths*
Harry: Um why are you wearing that mask?
Darth Vader: Helps me breath considering my lungs got pretty much wrecked when i was being covered in lava a few years back.
Legolas: Oh! new massage treatment?
Darth V.: No. It was an accident...of sorts.
Legolas: Okay then. You dont look that intimidating for a dark lord though. I mean come on. That helmet just looks like you stole it from some Hell's Angels motorcycle gang. And black is sooo cliche for a dark lord. Why not mauve?
DV: I am a dark lord though!
Ron: Right. And i am going to live out my dream to marry Draco and live together in the South of France with our surrogate child born from Hermione. This child shall be named Emanuel and he will be the greatest rugby player to ever live.
Draco and Hermione: Excuse me?
Voldie: Come on guys he is soo a dark lord.
DV: Yeah def. I mean the fact that i killed a bunch of people (the women and children as well!) who were holding my dying mother in captive and then proceeded to go against the Jedi order and marry some hot chica knock her up and then kill some more people slowly going over to the dark side of the Force which culminates in a heated lightsaber battle with my friend and mentor whom i had betrayed.
Paw S.: Oh it was a heated battle all right.
Paw S.: Oh like no one could tell about the *hint hint nudge nudge* relationship between you and Obi Wan.
Voldie: Hey dude its not nice to make assumptions.
Paw S.: Obi Wan was soooo shagging your wife DV. Yeah his whole "lightsaber training with a new padwan"...Obi told me everything. And i hear that he also had a go at your mum. Lets just say that her midichlorine count definatly went up a bit with Obi.
DV: *moves a big rock towards Paw S. with Force*
Paw S.: I am writing this dialogue! Your puny Sith lord tricks wont work on me!
DV: Fine i think i will just go and sulk in that there corner.
Harry: He's rather angsty for a dark lord. Whats his prob.
Voldie: Got made fun of alot for his asthma as a boy. Always wore to much black, was a mamma's boy. You know the usual basic social quirks that lead to Dark Lordness.